Spiritual Exercises

These are different from those of St. Ignatius of Loyola.

They are what I do every other Thursday, at 10 AM, when I am privileged-honored-delighted to host an hour of such exercises as volunteer chaplain at the psychiatric floor of our local hospital. 

I introduce myself as volunteer, not a professional or ordained chaplain. The group of 8 to 12 (out of a population of perhaps 40) come voluntarily: they may be religious or spiritual or curious. They respond very well when they learn I direct a residence for low income women, many coming from just such mental health programs. I compare our activities to those of a physical trainer: whatever type of body...big/little, old/young, athletic/disabled, etc...we share the basic human form and can all benefit from basic exercises like stretching, walking, light weight resistance, etc. So, while we have different religious beliefs and practices, there are basic spiritual exercises that benefit all of us.

Gratitude 

I ask what they are grateful for about being in this hospital. Many acknowledge support from staff and peers. I ask what they are grateful for about their childhood. Great variety here: friends, sports, grandparents. Not so much mention of mother or father. I relate the episode of Oprah Winfrey in which a number of celebrities shared how their lives were transformed after they started their nightly "gratitude journal" in which they would list five things of the day about which they were grateful, however minor or trivial. Each related: decline of anxiety, depression, jealousy, resentment, regret and increase of serenity, confidence, hope, energy. I share my practice when I unexpectedly feel low I number on my fingers 10 things for which I am grateful and it works like magic: I feel better immediately. I explain the habit I have developed over the years, especially if I bang my head (I am tall and awkward) or hammer my finger, of going directly into thanksgiving and praise. The pain does not disappear by it is reduced by maybe 80%. This makes sense psychologically: if you are not focused on the pain, not cursing it, but focused elsewhere, it retreats into the background and decreases immensely. They were impressed with my recent auto accident in which my car was totaled: immediately upon impact I started my habit of thanks/praise: a few seconds later I rejoiced to realize I was feeling only moderate pain in my chest but otherwise entirely normal; I registered where I was and that I did have the right of way, that the other driver was walking around, that I would not have to go to work today with my head cold, and that I would soon be the recipient of tons of attention from police and medics. I encourage the exercise of gratitude as the gateway to serenity, hope, generosity, and strength.

Powerlessness

This is, of course, the first of the famous 12 steps, with which some of them are familiar. They are happy to hear I have attended EA meetings: Emotions Anonymous. They nod agreement that we all have things over which we are powerless: addictions, but also feelings of anxiety, depression, anger, regret, jealousy and so forth. I ask that they quietly inventory their own issues. I suggest surrender...but of a very specific sort. Not despairing surrender to the affliction; but acknowledgment of it, simultaneous with an act of trust that a "higher power" (of whatever name) can mercifully assist. As we are a mile from the ocean, I recall that caught in a riptide we do not swim against it, but swim with it temporarily as we wave for assistance and wait chance to swim out of it. I share my training in skid control in my career at UPS with truck drivers: the instinctive reaction to a skid is to slam the brakes and turn the wheel out of the skid. This is the worst thing to do: the brakes and tires both freeze and you continue in the skid. The correct practice is counterintuitive: you pump, but do not slam, the brakes to gradually regain traction as you steer, at first, into the skid. With traction established, you steer out of the skid. But first, there is a certain surrender. And so, the path to freedom is first an acceptance of powerlessness, along with trust in something greater than ourselves.

We also discuss another powerlessness: over those around us, especially close family and friends. Here we draw from ALANON and ACOA. We all live with people who are out of control...in some dimension. If we do not acknowledge our powerlessness we can be caught in illusion of our control or codependent/enabling compulsions. I knew an Irish Catholic priest who told me he had never lived anywhere, family or seminary or rectory, where there were not alcoholics. I explain how the surrender of control frees us to merely love, but not enable, and pray for the one close to us.

Support System

Normally, the residents on that floor are out within a week, hopefully back to their ordinary life. And so I ask them to reflect on their support network: those who encourage them, whom they trust, with whom they are safe, who elicit the best of them....even a single person. Earlier, at introduction, in explaining our residence for women, I had emphasized our amazing network of support: family, friends, contributors, volunteers. I insist that whatever goodness we reflect is an echo of goodness we have received. I refer to the "mimetic" character of human life: we imitate what we see and so what we look to and associate is determinative. I encourage them to appreciate their network...family, friends, church-synagogue-temple, support group, doctor and therapist...and deepen it, strengthen it, expand it, and pray for it.

Final Thoughts

I have considered other, move rigorous spiritual exercises, but see that they are demanding, delicate, and dangerous for those in a fragile psychic state. For example: the making of amends to those we have harmed, including asking for forgiveness. Likewise the other side of the coin: forgiving those who have harmed us. These are miraculous healing actions but delve deeply into suffering and wounds. Such are appropriate in a more long term, stable setting such as spiritual/pastoral direction, 12-step  and fellowship groups. That would be like putting folks in recovery from a disability into a strenuous program of heavy weight lifting and long distance running!  By contrast, I am confident about the positive, wholesome influence of these three simple activities.

My wife and I have been surprised and delighted by our experience as voluntary chaplains in the hospital. People of all classes and faiths are pleasantly welcoming. Those in hospital beds, facing suffering, sickness and medical procedures are, of course, stripped of the superficial and face-to-face with the ultimate. Christians of all stipes, and (strikingly) Jews more observant and secular, but also agnostics, Muslims, Hindus...rich and poor...liberal and conservative...are naked in their neediness and longing, if not explicit belief, for healing, for Mercy, for grace from above. 

We have been mentored by an amazing chaplain, Reverend Cindy Wilcox, who exudes a heavenly radiance of faith, hope and love without the trappings of any religion or system. Benefiting from that as well as my acquaintance with the 12-step tradition, I feel comfortable with a spirituality that expresses so much of my own Catholic faith but in a way available to almost everyone. Catholics make up almost half of the hospital population and with those I move easily into the regulars: Our Father, Hail Mary, and (as appropriate) reception of Holy Communion. With the others, there is a delicate and fascinating dance as I listen and they somehow always manifest their history and their heart and we join in bringing their pain and desires to God (aka "higher power" aka Jesus aka Allah)! There is the sense that entering each hospital room...with fear and trepidation...we are on the threshold of heaven!