Loneliness of a Charismatic Catholic

 I am certainly not lonely as a Catholic, surrounded on all sides by Catholics of varying stripes and the entire Communion of Saints. But I am lonely as a charismatic Catholic. If I relate to 200 or 300 people a month (family, work, friends, etc.) the vast majority are Catholic; only two are charismatic, my niece's husband Mark, a zealous, talented musician and Florence, my Kenyan co-worker now paralyzed by a stroke.  Early in our marriage (1973-8 when the renewal was flourishing ) we participated fervently in a charismatic prayer group; this had a profound effect on my faith.

I would describe my own Catholic faith in five essential dimensions:

1. Conservative of the faith I received: ethnic (Irish), urban, working class, late Tridentine in the thriving golden era of postwar America.

2. Evangelical-Vatican II with that Council understood, following John Paul and Benedict, as continuous with tradition and centered in the person/event of Jesus Christ. My own life-changing encounter with Jesus occurred in a Cursillo, in 1973, at the age of 26.

3. Social Teaching of the Church is very important: solidarity with the poor and suffering, natural law, common good, subsidiarity, primacy of the family, value of all  human life.

4. Cultural Warrior, for my entire adult life, from the 1970s, defensive of powerless human life, the sacred spousal (unitive/procreative) meaning of sexuality and of femininity/masculinity, against the Cultural Liberalism that has prevailed across elite culture over the last 50 years.

5. Charismatic/Pentecostal: participant in the 1970s in this lay renewal movement within and beyond Catholicism.

Our singular JOY as a married couple is that our children and their families all practice our Catholic faith, with significant vigor and insight and in different styles. The heritage I received is being received now by a new generation. However, I have not been able to share in its fullness and clarity the Pentecostal/Charismatic dimension we received in the 1970s.

The reason for this failure is simple: going into the 1980s we no longer participated in communal charismatic prayer. Like all religion/spirituality, Pentecostalism is in large part mimetic/communal/contagious. Therefore, since we do not publicly pray in charismatic fashion (tongues, prophesies, deliverance, physical gestures, etc.) Our children have received what we ourselves practiced. 

In raising our family, we did associate with charismatic and similar evangelical groups and events: World Youth Days, NET retreats, pilgrimages, men's conferences, Franciscan University of Steubenville events, etc. Therefore, they did interiorize  a lively, Evangelical form of Catholicism, in line with Vatican II, Popes John Paul and Benedict, and the lay renewal movements.

One son with his family is passionately engaged with the Neocatechumenal Way, which is even more intense and demanding than the Charismatic Renewal. A daughter is living the evangelical/consecrated life within the Communion and Liberation Movement as a "Memores Dominini" (similar to a secular institute as a "lay" life, in the world, but vowed to poverty, chastity and obedience within a community of prayer and charity.) CL is another lay, evangelical, renewal movement out of Italy which reflects a classical, "renaissance" positivity and confidence in Catholic life. Our oldest granddaughter is working this year as an intern for the Jesuit journal America and obviously energized by a different, vital but more progressive flavor of Catholicism. The others live a normal, wholesome, enthusiastic Catholic life within parish, Catholic schools and related organizations. In the broadest sense, they are receptive of the Pentecostal graces of baptism/confirmation. 

We participated in the Catholic Charismatic Renewal as it was peaking in 1973-9. Interestingly, in 1980 our local prayer group disbanded and we joined our local parish and enrolled our oldest in the Catholic school. Our formal engagement with the Renewal ended. By strange coincidence, the movement across the country went into pronounced decline at the exact same time. Almost over night, most prayer meetings stopped; the huge conferences shrank in size; there was disunity within the leadership and troubles with the Church hierarchy. In middleclass, white America the movement seemed to disappear as quickly as it appeared.

I look back on those years with sublime joy and gratitude, as well as some nostalgia and grief at loss. My life was very much one of steady euphoria, despite the usual insecurities and difficulties of family life and work. We were swept up by communal praise, song, enthusiasm, evangelical zeal, optimism, closeness to Jesus in the Holy Spirit, fervent conferences, love of Scripture, lots of reading, sound theology, contrasting impulses towards ecumenism and a deepening of our Catholicism. We seemed to move from glory to glory. God, through the movements of the Holy Spirit, seemed always close, powerful, and surprising.

Then the six year honeymoon ended. We returned to more normal Catholic life. BUT, the fire within still burned, even if it was not so inflamed communally. What happened to Charismatic Renewal? What is the "baptism of the Holy Spirit?" What is the relationship of that event and corresponding movement  to broader Catholic life?

These questions will be addressed in the following blog essays.

the broader Catholic life? 

These are complex, profound questions which will be addressed in the next two blogs.