Under the Influence...of Woman

"Strong feminine influence" the graphologist wrote in her analysis of my handwriting. Interesting! My view is that we are created, man and woman, precisely to influence each other: to revere, instruct, correct, encourage, care for, inspire, humble and ennoble each other. We are SO different; and we SO need to give to and receive from each other... in reverence, trust, tenderness and gentle strength. The feminine influence is primary: we are en-fleshed and then enmeshed with our mother while our father is a strange and distant figure who must be befriended. The crucial oedipal passage, for the boy, is absolutely decisive as he cannot become a man without detaching from Mom and attaching to Dad. This passage is never complete or perfect so that later the man continues the dramatic journey into robust virility as he relates with women. Interaction with gracious, grace-filled femininity arouses and cultivates wholesome virility; in the presence of womanly goodness and loveliness the man becomes tender, caring, protective, self-less, sensitive, humble, contrite, reverent, encouraged, confident, courageous, spousal and paternal. There are a limited number of relationships with the feminine for the pilgrim-male. Abstinence from feminine influence will leave the man restless, agitated, depressed, lethargic, unmotivated and despairing. Alternately, the man can become dominant, controlling, manipulative...a predator and a rapist! Thirdly, the weak man can be submissive to the seductive and dominating femne fatale...as did Adam in the garden. Finally, the man can surrender himself, in an act of serene freedom, to the influence of holy womanhood. This is what Jesus did in becoming man. This is what John and the apostles did after Jesus died and left them his mother. This is what we do...mostly unconsciously and effortlessly as we are loved by our mother, wife, sisters, daughters and friends. This is what we Catholics do when we are immersed in our holy mother Church.