The Virile Virtues: Fortitude, Chastity, Humility

For a male, the achievement of fortitude, chastity and humility is a life-or-death issue. On the one hand, it is an achievement because he himself must choose, struggle, bleed, fail, and conquer in mortal combat. In another way, it is not only his own achievement because he is dependent upon the influence of good women, the encouragement of good mentors, and the support of good brothers. It is not so for the female. Her's is another path altogether. Consider blood: the vehicle and symbol of life itself. The male, like Jesus on the cross or the hero in battle, must spill his blood in combat. The woman, by strongest contrast, passes blood as a fluid expression of her organic, fecund femininity. The male must carry and die on his own cross; the woman, like Mary at Calvary, dies the death of compassion as she suffers with the one she loves. These three virtues are absolutely essential for the flourishing of genuine virility.

1.   Fortitude is what constitutes masculinity. That is, strength and courage as tender, gentle, protective, trustworthy and sacrificial. This does not come naturally. True, there is a certain physical strength: some men are tough, fierce, aggressive by nature; others sensitive, meek and timid by nature. This is not insignificant, but is a primitive, low, crude type of strength. That instinctive strength or weakness is merely the raw material for genuine fortitude: the tough guy must learn to be tender, kind, protective. The sensitive guy must learn to overcome his fear and compensate with greater emotional, moral and spiritual courage. Both have a long road to walk. This virtue also includes magnanimity: greatness, expansiveness, generosity of spirit; the impulse to think, decide and act with largeness of vision.

2.  Chastity is essential because the man is destined to tender and honor the woman,  her children,  the weak, and all that is precious, holy, true and good. But his voracious sexual appetites, his merciless egotism, his insecurity, and his explosive rage...all drive him to dominate, possess and devour the woman, in her very vulnerability, and all that is precious which he is destined to protect.  This is a monumental battle!

3.  Humility is arguably the most important because the masculine mission is to represent that which is greater than himself: the Fatherhood of God, Truth, good order, accountability, tradition, authority and the Good. He needs always to point beyond himself to something greater: like John the Baptist pointed to Jesus. Toxic masculinity as arrogance and narcissism is a darkness that blocks the light of the True and the Good and the Beautiful, rather than communicating it.

In one sense, masculinity is a lonely path that each man must walk alone; in a deeper way, however, we are bound to each other and we all have a stake in each man's virile virtue. And so, each of us men benefits from the influence, prayer, correction, and encouragement of good men and women.